Resolution and Capitulation
by phaedraphelan
Summary: Matters come to a head between Sherlock and Joan and they must face their feelings. What will they do?
1. Chapter 1

**RESOLUTION AND CAPITULATION. Chapter one**

**by phaedraphelan **

Summary: How Sherlock and Joan might come face-to-face with what is between them and find that it is more powerful and more full of surprises than they could have possibly anticipated. Based on season three episodes. Joanlock alert.

Disclaimer: Elementary is the artistic property of CBS and no infringement is intended.

**Sherlock had been back in New York for more than a month trying to regain a professional footing with Captain Gregson and the NYPD as a consultant, dealing with the difficult personality of Kitty, his current protégée and more than anything else, trying to repair his damaged relationship with Watson. In addition to everything else he had to contend with the pressure of the needs of his own flesh. He had missed Joan so terribly that he couldn't bear being an ocean away from her any longer. Now that he was back in the familiar environs seeing her again was extremely difficult. He had to admit that he needed Joan, that he was a man, first and last, and that his manly nature craved Joan.**

**As for Joan, she had formed a liaison with Andrew, a man who she had hoped would be able to fulfill her own intensely passionate needs, but he proved to be barely adequate. Andrew, while he was a few years younger than she was, was of more temperate nature and she found herself taking the initiative more often than not. And Andrew always left her wanting "more." In addition, seeing Sherlock again hit her like a ton of bricks. She tried to discount her feelings, but the effect he had on her was so real that she was afraid that she could not hide it from him. As it was, she could not resist working along with him again. She was drawn to him as to a magnet. So when he practically begged her to allow him to work with her on cases, she could not deny him this. **

**Joan had run off to Copenhagen on a whim with Andrew when he unexpectedly went there on business, mainly because she could not face her feelings for Sherlock. The trip did not draw her closer to Andrew, did not make her want to be in a committed relationship with him. After having been around Sherlock again for even a short time, it felt as if she had lost her last friend when she was in Denmark and Sherlock was back in New York.**

**But Sherlock had not been with a woman since before coming back to the city. It was the longest time he had passed without female attention since when he was in rehab. After the debacle of Mycroft and Joan, Sherlock had lost his appetite for casual sex. He just had no desire to be with a stranger. But that did not mean that he had no desire for anyone. He wanted Joan. And that want was so persistent now that it was a constant distraction. The sight of her after all those months provoked an intense, nearly unmanageable reaction in his flesh.**

**Joan noticed that Sherlock was under stress and she sensed that some of it was sexual stress. During their time together she had gotten to know his tells quite well and she knew the signs, the bouncing about, the hyperkinetic gestures. She saw in his eyes the need, the anxiety when they worked together on cases together. That day when Sherlock finally came clean with her and told her the he came back to New York because of her, because of the fact that he felt they were bound together in some way, she was stunned. She had wanted to hug him but she was afraid as he of what the consequence would have been if they had touched. But for the ringing of the phone it would have happened and Joan still quivered inside at the thought of what that would have done to the two of them.**

**Now Sherlock had not been sleeping for days; he could not get Joan out of his mind. On top of everything else she had come to the brownstone wearing those black leather shorts that highlighted her shapely hips and legs and he had found himself unable to stop staring at her backside. He finally went to her apartment, ostensibly to see Clyde, who was staying with her for a few days in their shared custody arrangement.**

**"Sherlock?" Joan asked as she let him into her apartment.**

**"I brought along some of this Bibb lettuce that Clyde likes."**

**"Go ahead and feed him. He hasn't eaten today."**

**Sherlock sat at the table where the terrarium was and began to give Clyde the lettuce. He was trying to hold himself still but he was _very_ jumpy. Finally he sat back and just shook his head in frustration.**

**"I am so tired, Watson. I haven't been sleeping the last few nights. I wonder if it is the tediousness of maintaining my sobriety. Life just goes on and I can't seem to see where I am going sometimes. I have needs that seem impossible to care for."**

**Joan sat down opposite him and looked at him carefully. There were dark circles under his eyes, lines that had not been there months ago before all those terrible things happened. She knew that Sherlock often went without sleeping when working on a case from their _previous_ two years together, but he always eventually collapsed when his body demanded it and went to sleep on the spot.**

**"How many nights without sleep?"**

**"I don't know. . . three or four nights maybe."**

**"Are you all right otherwise? You look like you need to 'go out,' Sherlock," Joan said referring to his past forays when he was in need sexually.**

**"I don't want that any more, at least not like that."**

**"So this is not something a visit from the Lynch sisters could take care of?"**

**"No, I will not be calling the Lynch sisters, Watson," he said with a note of finality.**

**Joan let the silence fall between them and it was a bit awkward.**

**"So . . . are you and Andrew still an item?" Sherlock asked cautiously.**

**"Not really. I think the trip to Denmark let me see that he was just not exciting enough for me. I tried to make it work. But I knew when I came back home that I could not be happy with him. Now that he is back it is not working, Sherlock. I have really tried, but you were right. Perhaps it's true. Maybe I _am_ some sort of romantic terrorist. I can't seem to find that one right man."**

**"Perhaps you just haven't found the man who can do what needs to be done for you."**

**"Perhaps . . . I don't know. What does that mean anyway? What needs to be done for me?"**

**"Perhaps you haven't found the man who can take care of your sexual needs, someone who is more than merely 'adequate.'"**

**"And by that you mean what, Sherlock?"**

**Sherlock simply stared at her for a long moment before he spoke again. As outspoken as he normally was, he didn't feel free to speak his mind on such an intensely personal matter as her sexual urges. He had already in a previous conversation overstated himself when he compared her to a female baboon with inflated genitalia taking a chance on whoever came her way. He had seen the hurt in her eyes that his acerbic words had caused and he had no desire to inflict further pain upon her with his sharp tongue. Moreover the sight of Joan had so stimulated him the his need for relief nearly overwhelmed him and he had to force himself to keep from reaching out for Joan.**

**"I should not have come over here. I don't want to impose upon you, Watson. I just don't want to go back to the brownstone right now. The place seems so empty. I don't enjoy being alone these days."**

**"Where's Kitty?"**

**"She's out with that Zachary, probably might want to bring him home with her. You see, I'm trying to give her her freedom to have a social life."**

**"Would you like to try to get some sleep here . . . on my sofa?"**

**"You wouldn't mind? I don't want to overstep . . ."**

**"I wouldn't invite you to rest here if I didn't mean it, Sherlock."**

**Sherlock kicked off his shoes and walked to the sofa and stretched out there. He loosened his belt and trousers, opened his collar a couple of buttons and pulled his shirt out of his pants so as to make himself comfortable. Joan could not help but notice his state of agitation and all the indications of his arousal and it affected her profoundly. **

**In just a couple minutes Sherlock was out like a light, but when Joan got a blanket and started to cover him with it, he roused suddenly at the scent of her fragrance and caught Joan's wrist, holding it in a viselike grip.**

**"It's you, Joan. I do need you. . . you," Sherlock said desperately, as his arousal came hard upon him in that moment.**

**The next thing Joan knew she was on top of Sherlock, in his arms.**

**"I want you, Joan. God, it's more than that. I need you. Please I beg you. But I will not take what I am not freely given, Joan."**

**Joan stared at him, understanding him, understanding the intensity of his need, feeling his need throbbing through his flesh in that very moment.**

**He was instantly filled with remorse and released Joan's arm and shook his head. "I am truly sorry. I should leave now. I dare not encroach upon you."**

**Joan then stood up and in a very matter-of-fact manner pulled off her shirt and stepped out of her slacks and underthings as Sherlock watched in disbelief. Then she lay down on top of him.**

**"I give this freely to you, Sherlock," Joan said, kissing him full on his mouth. "Can you give me what I need?"**

**Sherlock groaned passionately, wrapping his arms around Joan, kissing her hungrily, tasting her mouth, pulling at her lower lip with his teeth as Joan kissed him back running her hands through his hair. Sherlock growled softly and then he sat up so that Joan was straddling him as she pushed his shirt off and pulled his trousers out of the way so that he could kick them to the floor as he kissed her over and over. They didn't stop kissing for a moment and the next instant their bodies were in perfect congruence to join but then Sherlock stopped suddenly.**

**"Joan! Do you want this as much as I? I dare not encroach."**

**"Sherlock . . . Please, Sherlock!"**

**When they began to come together in intercourse, Sherlock's girth momentarily shocked Joan. She had never been with a man so heavily-endowed physically. **

**"Sherlock . . . Ooh, Sherlock," she groaned as her body stretched to accommodate him. "Ooh, yes! Oh, God!"**

**"I don't want to hurt you, Joan! Do you want me to stop?"**

**"No! Please don't stop! Oh, Sherlock!"**

**When he heard her cry of need, Sherlock's manly nature took over and then there was nothing that could stop him as he pushed into her till suddenly they were joined as man an woman and he felt Joan's parts accept his girth completely as they ****fitted in exquisite perfection.**

**"Thank you . . . Joan . . . Oh, luv! Luv!" Sherlock cried out when Joan finally gripped his hips, pulling him deep inside her.**

**"Oh, Sherlock, I didn't know. I didn't know it would be like this! Ooh, Sherlock! Yes! Yes, Sherlock!"**

**They found themselves rocking in perfect rhythm, climbing to the heights of an ecstasy such as neither of them had ever experienced in their lives. And when they found that perfect rhythm, Sherlock snorted and growled as he forced himself to slow things down so that they could prolong their moments of satisfaction in a deep rolling rhythm that was exquisite beyond description as they gazed into each other's eyes, something Joan had never experienced with any man.**

**"You are so beautiful! So beautiful!"**

**"Sherlock! Yes! Yes! Oh, Sherlock! Yes, Sherlock!"**

**"Joan . . . Joan . . . I needed you so."**

**As they continued to rock together, their bodies inched to the edge of that precipice that would cast them over its edge and Joan's eyes began to roll about helplessly in her head as ecstasy ****welled up inside her as spasms began to surge through the deepest part of her unlike anything she could have imagined.**

**"Sher . . . Sher . . . lock! Ooh! Yes, Sherlock!" she cried out, gripping him for dear life. "Help me, Sherlock!"**

**"I must take you there, luv. I'm about to be gone."**

**When Joan received Sherlock's powerful final thrusts, she lost vision as the climax swept her and Sherlock saw her eyes finally roll back in her head as she gasped and cried out his name.**

**"Sherlock!"**

**"God! Joan! Woman!" Sherlock groaned. "I love you, Joan!"**

**And then he was gone, snorting like a wild horse, his own body jerking in spasm after spasm. **

**At that moment Joan for the first time in her life felt herself melting completely in surrender in a man's arms, plunging on what was like a wild roller coaster ride from the heights that left her pelvic muscles jerking helplessly, floating in a dimension she had never experienced, as spasm after spasm seized her in a vaginal orgasm deeper inside her than she had ever believed possible.**

**"Sherlock . . . Sherlock," she moaned as she lay conquered in his arms, still jerking and trembling.**

**Then neither of them could speak another sane word as they slipped into the afterglow, murmuring unintelligible sounds to one another. **

**"Please, let's get into bed, luv," Sherlock finally whispered, when he regained the power to speak. **

**He picked Joan up and carried her into the bedroom where they lay down together in her bed and without a word they reached for each other again.**

**"Sherlock, help me! I . . . I need . . . want more of you! Oh, Sherlock!" Joan begged as she crawled onto his chest.**

**Joan clung to him and Sherlock groaned as his passions asserted themselves powerfully again and they climbed that mountain again, even more slowly, extending the pleasure till they could hold back no more and the mind-blowing climax took them again and then left them sobbing in its wake, as Joan gave him again what no other woman had ever given him.**

**"I . . . I don't know what to say, Joan. I have been in such dire straits. And you, you surrendered to me. I felt you give all of yourself. Oh, God, Joan****"**

**"For the first time I couldn't help it. I never could give in completely to any man till now. I would reach that point, but then I just couldn't let go, Sherlock. You knew my need. You took me completely apart. . . piece by piece, till all of me, every bit of me, belonged to you. Oh, my dearest Sherlock!"**

**"Every woman, even Irene, always held something of herself back . . . till you, luv. ****It was the most beautiful experience of my life, my darling Joan. I am still trembling all over, quivering from head to toe. Oh, Joan . . . Joan."**

**"Sherlock . . .baby . . . my baby," Joan murmured softly.**

**Sherlock held Joan, cooing softly to her with sounds and in words he had never spoken as she smoothed his brow, kissing him tenderly. **

**"Sweetheart . . . my lovely honeybee . . . Joanie . . ."**

**"It's all right, baby. Just rest and sleep. You were so very tired."**

**"I haven't been able to sleep because I kept thinking about you . . . my feelings for you. . . It has all been driving me quite mad, luv."**

**Sherlock groaned as he felt his flesh asserting itself again.**

**"Forgive me, Joan, but I fear I can't get enough of you tonight. I can't get enough. I have wanted you for so long . . . and you . . . you need my attention. You are in desperate need of attention."**

**Joan now for the first time touched Sherlock intimately, caressing him, letting her sensitive fingers get to know his excited parts as he moaned her name gratefully. **

**"You are . . . indescribable, Sherlock. You unlocked me inside . . . my deepest feelings . . . everything. You do know what I need, don't you?"**

**"I believe that I have always known what you need, from the first day we met. I am yours, Joan. I don't want anyone else. I had to bring this thing back here to you because I do love you more than anyone else in the world."**

**Joan kissed his chest, then his muscled belly all over and then as she continued to kiss him, Sherlock gasped and quivered in agony as she got to know him as she had never known him before.**

**"Joan! Joan! Yes!"**

**Sherlock writhed in ecstasy, seeing stars, unable to keep from crying out in the semi-darkness of the bedroom at the supreme moment until he lay finally at peace, moaning Joan's name, and when Joan kissed his mouth and he tasted himself upon her lips and tongue, he wept. **

**"Being with you like this is beyond my wildest dreams, Joan, beyond even the effect of any drug experience. My heart . . . all that I am is yours."**

**"I do love you, Sherlock. Just please take care of me. I was so afraid when those people kidnapped me. All I could think about was wanting and needing my Sherlock to come for me. I realize now that there is only one man in my life . . . you. There exists no other man for me."**

**Sherlock turned Joan onto her back and began to kiss her hungrily, drinking her kisses in long satisfying draughts, his hands searching all over her body and then he suddenly came into her again so powerfully that she gasped for breath, fluttering like a butterfly in his arms as he took her. **

**"Yes! Yes! Oh, yes!"**

**Joan welcomed him with joy and they were gone again, lost in their passion for one another, taking their time to climb that mountain again till they saw those brilliant flashes of light exploding in their brains. **

**"Oh, God, Joan! Joan!" Sherlock roared her name in exultation when Joan melted again in that supreme moment in a capitulation unlike anything Sherlock had received, causing him to sob in ecstasy.**

**They lay in bed together on that night and they knew that their lives had forever changed. Neither of them had ever experienced sexually what they had happened to them on this day. Love words that they had only imagined using flowed freely from their lips in fervent whispers till they fell asleep on the same pillow.**

**It was several hours later when Joan wakened, Sherlock was wrapped around her spooning. It was a closeness that felt completely natural somehow. When she turned a bit, Sherlock woke up and hugged her, kissing her tenderly behind her ear. He was relaxed, completely mellowed out, but he was concerned for Joan.**

**"Joan, luv, forgive me if I caused you pain. I forget sometimes that my . . . girth can sometimes be overwhelming."**

**"You are magnificent, Sherlock . . . magnificent. Are you all right, baby?"**

**"Very much so, my dear Watson," he said huskily. "I am overwhelmed to be finally in your arms. I have been in such need and for so long and then things took such a bad turn nine months ago. My flesh, my body has ached so for the comfort of yours. . . every time I would lie down and try to sleep, my need for you came upon me with such force that I felt that I would lose my mind. And now that we have come together, it is all beyond my wildest dreams, my darling . . . my sweetheart . . . love of my life . . . my honeybee . . . my Joan . . . my very dearest Watson."**

**Sherlock continued to murmur endearments that had never passed his lips as he tenderly kissed Joan's neck and shoulders over and over making her shiver in delight.**

**"Oh, Sherlock . . . baby, I was so afraid that you didn't really love me. I was so afraid." **

**Joan turned in Sherlock's arms and began to cry into his chest and he just held her, smoothing her hair, stroking her soft skin as his own eyes filled and spilled over, wetting her shoulder.**

**"Joan . . . I love you. God! I have loved you from that first day when you came to the brownstone!"**

**"Didn't I tell you that I wanted to be in your orbit? I wanted to be with you, but I was so afraid . . . till last night when I saw you suffering so. I couldn't bear to see you suffer like that."**

**"When you shed your clothes and then lay on top of me, my heart stopped beating for that moment. Woman, you are so beautiful . . . so beautiful."**

**Sherlock caught his breath and exhaled raggedly as his passions surged so powerfully that he was caught completely off guard as his body began to move against Joan's with unmistakeable purpose.**

**"Luv . . . luv! Will you take me there, to that beautiful place again! Please!"**

**"Yes . . . Sher . . . Sherlock!"**

**Joan welcomed him again and they were gone, lost in the joy of what they had found together. There was nothing gentle or tentative as they made love in those early predawn hours and Joan matched Sherlock passion for passion scratching him and biting him as he became like a wild horse on her, grunting and snorting with each powerful thrust, giving Joan what she had been waiting for all of her life. And then when the climax finally took them, Joan's teeth began to clatter as ecstasy seized her and the next instant both of them saw what seemed like all the stars of the Milky Way. **

**"Oh, sweet Jesus!" Sherlock cried in agony as he gave Joan his life essence.**

**They lay finally exhausted upon each other, incoherent and speechless, moaning softly to each other till they drifted off again.**

**When Sherlock wakened from the deepest sleep he had experienced in months a few hours later, he became aware of the aroma of coffee brewing. Joan was making breakfast. He pulled on his boxers and went to find her. She had showered and wrapped herself in a long bright blue silk robe, her long hair was down on her shoulders and when she turned to face Sherlock, he could see his mark upon her. He saw her love for him, all of it. . . in her dark eyes, on her mouth still swollen from his kisses, in the deep flush upon her cheeks and spreading down across her chest. She was his now. She would always be his.**

**Sherlock went to her and let his hands run up and down her body against the soft silk of her robe, squeezing her gently as he leaned in for a long kiss. Joan responded by hugging Sherlock with both her arms so that a groan escaped his lips.**

**"I missed you in bed, luv. I never want to sleep alone again."**

**"You shouldn't have to," Joan answered. "But you should sit down and eat now. I have the cereal you love and fresh strawberries." **

**Sherlock reluctantly released her and sat down and they ate together. They looked at each other with knowledge now and yet they knew that there was so much more to know. What had happened between them had opened up a new gateway between them that would never be closed. Now all that they wanted to do was explore and discover and yet they both knew that there were mysteries they would never solve about each other, that there was an intrigue that would never release its grip on them. Sherlock reached across the table to catch Joan's hand in his and he tenderly rubbed each of her fingertips with his thumb and then his thumb found the pulse point on her wrist and he felt her heartbeat throbbing for him.**

**"Please come and sit here on my lap, Joan. I need to have you close to me."**

**Joan came and sat on his lap as Sherlock finished his bowl of Cheerios. He took a large strawberry and presented it to her and Joan took it into her mouth but before she could begin to chew it he kissed her mouth and they tasted and chewed the strawberry together as both their mouths filled with the sweet juice of the fruit. **

**"Umm . . . luv," Sherlock murmured through the strawberry-flavored kiss as his hand found the sash of her silk robe and pulled it, releasing the robe from around her and revealing her completely to his passionate gaze. "You are so beautiful, so beautiful, Joan," he said as his sensitive fingers searching all over her body, exploring and getting to know breasts and belly and then the dark forest where her thighs came together, kissing her all the while.**

**That was when Joan's phone signaled a text message and Joan reluctantly looked at it.**

**"That is a text from Kitty. She is coming over here, wants to tell us something. Do you have any idea what's on her mind?"**

**"Not the foggiest. She and her Zachary have been going at it heavily for the past week or so." **

**Sherlock was still fully engrossed in kissing Joan's neck, her ****shoulders, inhaling deeply the scent of her skin.**

**"We should get dressed, Sherlock. I don't want to shock her."**

**"We can't hide anything today, luv. She asked me a couple days ago if you and I had ever 'hooked up,' to put it in her words."**

**"You're kidding me! What brought that on?"**

**"I believe she caught me staring at your lovely arse when you were wearing those blasted black leather shorts. I refused to answer her. She has no need for that information. But if she is coming over here, we should try to make ourselves presentable. I'll go take a quick shower."**

**Sherlock was still in the shower when the doorbell rang. Kitty.**

**Joan let her into the apartment. She took a second look at a very radiant Joan.**

**"I thought that your friend Andrew was in Denmark."**

**"He is not exactly still in the picture these days. Why do you ask about him?"**

**"Well, you've been with someone. That much is obvious."**

**That is when Sherlock came out of her bathroom wearing just his trousers low slung upon his hips, ****a towel draped across his shoulders. He excused himself, greeted Kitty, and went into Joan's bedroom and closed the door behind him.**

**"I see. I knew that Sherlock had the hots for you, Watson. You look like he took good care of you."**

**Joan was trying to think of an appropriate response when Sherlock came out of the bedroom. He had put on his shirt, but it was mostly unbuttoned and he was barefoot and adorably flushed and scruffy.**

**"Kitty, we are somewhat busy here at the moment. What do you need?"**

**Kitty took a long look at Sherlock. His languid blue-green eyes and slightly dilated nostrils completely betrayed his situation.**

**"Nothing that can't wait. I see that neither of you is fit for company. I will check in with Captain Gregson. Call me when you two have this thing between you under control. God, Watson, you sure know how to calm this man down! He looks almost catatonic."**

**Kitty went to the door and let herself out of Joan's apartment.**

**Joan looked at Sherlock and blushed deeply as Sherlock came to her, took her by her hand, kissed it, and led her back into the bedroom and closed the door behind them.**


	2. Chapter 2

**Resolution and Capitulation, Chapter 2**

**By phaedraphelan **

Summary: Sherlock and Joan start to realize what it means to be a couple and deal with the truth of the feelings they have for each other. What will they discover?

Disclaimer: Elementary is the artistic property of CBS and no infringement is intended.

**When Sherlock closed the door of Joan's bedroom he reached for both of her hands, brought each one up to his lips and kissed each tenderly.**

**"I look at you and I find myself at a loss for words, Joan. The blush l see upon your cheeks is an evidence of the satisfaction in your flesh at this moment. You are a treasure chest that has been opened and, for the moment, you cannot shut it."**

**"You opened it, my dear Sherlock. You are the one that opened it when you touched me last night. I have never been touched like that by any man."**

**Sherlock led Joan to the bed, drew her down alongside him and then just lay facing her staring into her eyes as his hand traced up and down her hip and flank, pushing away the silk of her robe so that he could touch her bare skin.**

**Joan reached to caress his stubbled cheek and smiled as her hand crept up to touch the fine wrinkles that had lately begun to form at the corners of his eyes. She inhaled his personal manly scent with its faint overlay of sandalwood and violin rosin that remained even after his shower and she reveled in it on the most basic human level.**

**"You are so different from any man I have ever been involved with, my dear Sherlock. None of them looked at all like you . . . not even Mycroft. But I want you to know that you are the most manly of them all."**

**Joan pushed his shirt open off his shoulder so that she could trace the lines of the extensive tattoo on his left shoulder and then down through the thick chestnut hair on his chest to his firm belly and then beyond there to examine every intimate part of him. Sherlock gasped softly as he enjoyed the sensation of her delicate fingers upon him. He was enjoying Joan's detailed up close and personal inspection of him immensely. She pulled his shirt completely off and stroked his forearm with its adornment of long silky hair and then took his hand and kissed it on back and put her face into his palm and kissed it. **

**"Do I pass muster, my dear Watson?" **

**Sherlock lay on his back propped against the pillows and Joan found herself blushing in the face of his full display of himself this way, despite her years of exposure to male genitalia in her work first as a doctor and now as a detective.**

**"I find your maleness and its parts to be quite stunning. You resemble that handsome sculpture of David by Michelangelo in all his parts, except that there is more of you."**

**Sherlock smiled. He had absolutely no embarrassment at Joan seeing him in all his masculine glory, but he realized that they were now changing all the parameters of their relationship and her frank appraisal of his manly gifts was something that filled his heart with a pride in his manhood that he had never exactly felt before. He was somewhat exultant at having been able to fulfill all her woman's needs so completely. **

**As he leaned forward, he kissed Joan gently on her mouth and slipped her robe from her and tossed it aside. Joan involuntarily drew the sheet from the bed up to cover her naked state and Sherlock took her hand and drew it down.**

**"Please, just allow me to feast my eyes upon your beauty. Don't be shy, luv."**

**Joan let the sheet down so that Sherlock could see all of her.**

**"We have waited so long to get to this point, haven't we?"**

**Sherlock kissed her again and the kiss deepened as they both began to lose control of the situation, and were about to become fully involved, when both their phones began to ring.**

**"I don't wish to stop now, Joan. Please don't answer it, luv."**

**His hands squeezed her hips as he kissed her over and over, pulling her over onto him so that he could touch her where he wanted.**

**"Ooh, Sherlock," she moaned. "You already know me so well."**

**But both phones persisted in ringing and finally they forced themselves to draw apart.**

**"And you know me now, darling. We need to be together. That is why I came back to New York. For you, luv. We are both still in dire need and we will have to attend to that need or it will drive us both out of out minds. Please promise that you will be with me tonight."**

**Joan nodded her 'yes' to him and finally they forced themselves to part, quickly dressed and went to meet Gregson and Bell.**

**Sherlock hailed a taxi with his whistle and they headed for the crime scene which was in a high end handbag shop in SoHo on Spring Street. **

**They sat in the cab trying to bring themselves back to the everyday after the emotional experience they had shared together since the previous night. They sat each with their thighs pressed tightly against the others, supremely conscious of what had just happened in their lives. Sherlock looked at Joan and there was a warmth in his expression that Joan had never seen before and it reached directly into her heart.**

**"Sherlock, we have to focus, don't we?"**

**"Yes, we do. We will pick up our personal matters later, Watson."**

**They arrived at the crime scene location. It was a Sunday afternoon and the street was full of people . . . shoppers, tourists. The handbag shop was the only shop in the block that was closed. There was a policeman standing in front of the door and the yellow police tape stretched across it indicating a crime scene. They spotted Captain Gregson inside with Detective Bell and Kitty was on the scene as well. **

**As they stepped inside the shop, they quickly saw the victim, middle-aged man of Southern European decent slumped backward behind the counter, his head bashed in with some sort of weapon. The fancy display cases containing the handbags had been smashed, but the bags had been left behind. At first glance it looked like a routine smash and grab.**

**Kitty stood in the background and simply rolled her eyes in Sherlock and Joan's direction as they came into the shop.**

**Sherlock examined the dead man extensively while Joan looked around the store. **

**"This is a bit of an enigma, Sherlock. Why kill the victim, smash up the place and then leave all the high end merchandise? These bags here . . . Hermès? They all run in the thousands of dollars. And these three hundred dollar silk scarves?" Gregson was thinking out loud.**

**Joan removed one of her gloves and ran her bare hand over one of the Hermès bags and then over another one. **

**"These are counterfeit . . . the bags, probably the scarves as well. The prices here are in the hundreds range. While that is quite expensive, genuine Hermès bags start in the thousands. That is why the perpetrator left these behind," Joan stated it as a fact. "These are all counterfeit, but being presented in such a high end setting would make them seem like the real thing to the untrained eye."**

**"I suggest we interview all the employees here as well as their suppliers. This looks like a deal gone bad. A lot of these people that make counterfeit high end are fronts for crime cartels. It's a shame that people in general don't appreciate that connection," Sherlock stated to everyone and then he gave Watson a wide-eyed stare the seemed somehow unconnected with his previous statement.**

**"We will take care of this crime scene. You might find out about the associates of Mr. Luigi Alberto, the deceased man here. We don't know if this is his establishment. He may be simply working here. We need to determine if h****e is the owner." Gregson directed. "It's Sunday, so the shop's suppliers would likely be closed, but it might be worthwhile for you and Watson to check out these offices listed on these invoices. Bell and I will visit this man's family. His address is up on Riverside Drive. Perhaps Kitty can finish examining this place with one of the officers here."**

**Gregson handed a stack of invoices from the desk of the victim to Sherlock and Joan and they left together. As they left, Sherlock placed his hand at Joan's lower back in a distinctly proprietary fashion and Gregson saw it. He did a half turn, surprised.**

**"He is different with her today, isn't he?" Gregson said to Marcus Bell.**

**"They been screwin' this morning. You blokes don't notice nothin,' do you," Kitty said as she walked around the crime scene.**

**Gregson and Bell stopped short and looked at each other, stunned, and then both laughed out loud.**

**Sherlock and Joan went out into the crisp autumn air together and began to walk in the street. At that point Sherlock reached for Joan's hand and caught it in his. **

**"I think that we need to go somewhere for privacy. We need to attend to each other, my dear Watson. Would you be partial to a little 'afternoon delight'? We can take the early afternoon to check out our victim's suppliers. Then there is a quite lovely boutique hotel just a few blocks uptown from here near Rockefeller Center, The Chatwal. My father has a standing arrangement with them. We can use his suite this afternoon. I believe that we should take care of this business speedily so that we can then devote some time to attending to our own mysteries."**

**Sherlock and Joan made their way to West 43rd Street and up into the building where the suppliers fo.r the bag shop were located. There was no one there, but they easily got inside where they found the evidence that all the merchandise was produced in Hong Kong and none of it in France. There were also the samples of the labels which would be placed on the counterfeit items, scattered about the work area. The work was of the finest quality and only the most discerning eye could catch the fact that these were all counterfeit.**

**"So we see where it all comes from. We just need to find the person who would murder to stop all this," Joan said. "If you were in business with a company and thought you were handling the genuine article and found that you were handling counterfeit merchandise, what might be your reaction? That is who we are looking for. Suppose Mr. Alberto was unaware that he was selling counterfeit merchandise, discovered it, and challenged his boss or bosses. That could have gotten him killed, for sure."**

**"Excellent deduction! By the way, Watson, how do you have such a keen appreciation of quality control in high end handbags? That was quite good back there."**

**"My father bought an Hermès Birkin bag for my mother when I was a teenager as an anniversary gift. It was red leather and she carries it to this day. I used to hold it, touch it all the time. Nothing feels exactly the same. You cannot fool me on that."**

**"That's what I love about you, Watson. You never forget anything. You are brilliant, woman."**

**Sherlock grabbed her around her waist and hugged her righty there in the quiet dusty workroom, but the hug acted as a sort of trigger and the passions that were being just barely held in check overrode everything and suddenly they were kissing hungrily, drinking from each other's lips as if they were dying of thirst, letting their hands rove all over each other.**

**"We must leave . . . now, luv. I am terribly aroused. We have to leave this minute before we completely forget where we are. I am in such an extremely vulnerable state right now. In fact I am sensing that we need to handle this."**

**Sherlock and Joan took a taxi to The Chatwal. They were frantic for each other in the back of the cab, their hands searching all over each other to touch and squeeze.**

**"God help me, I am in such need of you, dearest Joan. Please forgive me for my lack of self-control, but I finally know that my existence does have meaning and that is because of you, my darling."**

**They rolled up to The Chatwal and Sherlock and Joan went in. Sherlock had called ahead and their room was ready for them. Sherlock ordered lunch to be brought up in an hour and they went to the bank of elevators to go up to their room. Sherlock held Joan's hand as they took the elevator to the floor where there suite was located, trying to hold on to the last vestiges of his self-control.**

**They were hardly inside the suite of luxurious rooms when Sherlock pressed Joan hard up against the closed door, kissing her all over her face, pressing his body up against her body. He then picked Joan up and carried her into the bedroom, laid her down on the bed, drew her shoes off her feet, tossed them aside, kicked his own shoes off, and as they both shed their clothes, he began to kiss her so passionately that he took her breath away.**

**"Do you need me as I need you, Joan?"**

**"Yes! Yes! God, yes! I need you, Sherlock. I need you so."**

**Sherlock groaned as he gratefully eased into her depths and Joan cried out his name, as she welcomed him, gasping for her breath as Sherlock began moving rhythmically inside her as they lay upon the sumptuous bed linens.**

**"There you go, there you go. Oh, luv . . . luv! Yes, luv!" Sherlock snorted in that terribly masculine manner he had that Joan was learning to be the mark of his extreme sexual excitement.**

**"Sherlock . . . Ooh . . . Ooh . . ." Joan was crying out in his arms, her eyelashes fluttering out of control, as he rocked inside her.**

**"Oh, God! Thank you, luv!"**

**Sherlock felt the fullness in his own parts that portended his own release and snorted passionately. He wanted to see her come apart in his arms again, see her capitulate entirely, hear her helpless whimpers as she lay conquered in his arms.**

**"I'm blind with passion!" he cried out as they both came at the same time, their brains filled with the bright flashes of light as it washed over them and left them babbling incoherently in each other's arms.**

**They fell asleep just that way and it was an hour later when room service called with an exotic lunch of cold lobster and shrimp and avocado stuffed with crabmeat. They wakened, ate every bit of the delicious food in bed together, washed it down with sparkling Pelligrino and when they finished eating, they made love again, unable to let go of the passions that were at full tilt in them and then they slept again. **

**Joan awakened first later. The room was completely dark so she turned on the Tiffany bedside lamp and sat up in bed and watched Sherlock sleep. She had always loved to watch him sleep. He was so beautiful at rest, his long lashes evident in repose. Sherlock gradually realized that Joan had wakened and opened his eyes to stare at her. She was so lovely to him like this, naked, her long ebony tresses down on her shoulders, her eyes full of the memory of the moments they had shared. Sherlock was nude, all pretense blown away since they had finally become intimate and Joan took full advantage of her opportunity to look at his body as he lay stretched out before here. When he saw the love in Joan's eyes, he smiled at her and his flesh came alive powerfully. He moved toward Joan who threw the covers back as her knees parted in invitation to him. This gesture caused Sherlock to growl passionately and move to claim her again. **

**"Joan, I . . . I'm helpless when I see you in bed like this. I want you all the time, woman. I have desired you for so long . . . all the time that I have known you. Do you know how much I love you? I love you more than anyone else in the whole world."**

**"Oh, Sherlock . . . I love you, too," Joan sighed as he crouched over her and kissed her all over her body . . . her breasts, her shoulders, nipping her gently with his teeth as she moaned in response, pulling him down against her breasts, enjoying the sensation of his beard against her skin as he found comfort in suckling her breasts to his hearts content. "Oh, Sherlock, you pleasure me so!"**

**"Please accept me again, Joan. Forgive me my urgent need, but I have wanted you for so long. I needed . . . needed to be with you."**

**"Yes, I know. I am here for you now, Sherlock."**

**Then he got onto her in no uncertain manner, and took her again, snorting and gasping as he penetrated her and found the depths of her, shaking and trembling and crying her name out loud. Joan was the first woman in years that he had had unprotected intercourse with and the sensation of her flesh hugging his was so amazing that his whole body trembled and shuddered helplessly when he felt the velvet-like clasp of her parts.**

**"Oh, Joanie . . . Joanie, I love you to hold me inside you the way you do. You're so perfect for me, luv! Luv!" **

**"I'm here for you, Sherlock. It is so perfect, isn't it? I love you so much, baby."**

**Sherlock hugged Joan tightly as he rocked to and fro on her in the rhythm of coitus. At first Sherlock held them back so as to prolong the connection so that Joan could be completely satisfied, but then they both rapidly lost all control and raced to the climax together, the sounds of their moans and groans resounding throughout the hotel suite. Suddenly they both began to tremble as they approached the crest again.**

**"Ooh, Sherlock . . . Sherlock . . . Yes! Yes!"**

**Joan scratched Sherlock's shoulders, leaving long red marks on him but he felt nothing but the marvelous clasp of her flesh as he came into her again and again snorting and grunting like a bull in rut.**

**"Oh, luv . . . luv, I'm intoxicated . . . intoxicated with you. I do love you more than anyone in the world . . . more . . . more. Oh, God, woman!"**

**The spasms in his pelvis were releasing his life's essence in a series of powerful spurts.**

**"Ooh, Sher . . . this is so good . . . so good," Joan groaned in an agony as powerful spasms seized her in the very pit of her belly, rippling through her body from head to toe.**

**"Cry out, luv! There's no one to hear us, no one at all!"**

**"Sherlock, I'm seeing stars. I'm in ecstasy, baby," she cried out loud as his semen flooded her, refreshing her as she surrendered completely to him.**

**They spent the evening and the night at The Chatwal and it was nearly noon the next day when they had a special breakfast of croissants, coffee, and fresh raspberries topped with creme fraiche in their room.**

**"I thank you for coming here with me, for yesterday and last night all night long and for this morning. We needed this time together without interruption, luv. You gave me peace in my flesh and I slept, J****oan. I slept like the proverbial baby after being with you."**

**Sherlock and Joan stood in the middle of the beautiful hotel suite with their arms wound around each other and kissed over and over before leaving to go back to Brooklyn.**

**"You appear to be quite satisfied, luv."**

**"I confess that I am totally satisfied, Sherlock."**

**"Watching you walk across the hotel lobby yesterday afternoon, I saw the satisfaction evident in your lovely gait, your confident stride. The orgasms were good for you, weren't they? How many of them, luv?"**

**"I lost count, Sherlock," Joan said blushing deeply.**

**"I did not lose count. Each one of them, all twelve to be exact, is indelibly imprinted upon my brain. It will be my joy to continue to supply you with what you need, my dear Watson."**

**"Thank you, Sherlock. We should leave or number thirteen will be coming up. I am so excited by you. I am all to pieces inside."**

**"You are so beautiful . . . the most beautiful woman in my life."**

**Sherlock bent his head and took her hand and kissed it so fervently that Joan's heart throbbed out of control.**

**That afternoon Joan had an appointment with Dr. Candace Reed, her therapist. She had been making regular visits ever since the kidnapping and the debacle with Mycroft. When Sherlock left New York, Joan realized how much she missed him, how much she wanted him, and she had sought Dr. Reed's counsel. Now she felt she especially needed this appointment.**

**"I think you had transferred your feelings for Sherlock to Mycroft, Joan. Everything indicates that you really love Sherlock. You will not be happy until you come to terms with that."**

**"I now feel such guilt for having become involved with Mycroft. How can Sherlock forgive me?"**

**"If you want to be with Sherlock, that is your decision, Joan. You must decide to accept him or reject him and take the consequences of your action."**

**"He asked me to forgive him for leaving and I did not answer him because I need his forgiveness for Mycroft."**

**"You must answer him, Joan. Moment of truth."**

**"I had intercourse with him yesterday . . . several times. I just came from being with him. I have forgiven him . . . I just want to be sure that he has forgiven me . . . for Mycroft. I know that I have forgiven myself. He was so attentive . . . so passionate when we came together. Excuse me for being so blunt but, I could just barely accommodate him."**

**"And you found that to be?"**

**Joan blushed as she remembered the day and night she had spent with Sherlock.**

**"Amazing . . . beyond amazing. He touches me and it is magic. I am so gone for him, Candace. Do I dare think that I have found that one man for me?"**

**"You have had other relationships, Joan, most recently Andrew. How do you find this relationship with Sherlock to be different?"**

**"Andrew was a very nice person, but he just was not passionate enough for me. He was comfortable, but I wanted more emotion, more intensity. I wanted to be with him and not worry about how long he would pleasure me. I wanted to be able to abandon myself completely to him, but I couldn't, not with any of them. I couldn't surrender. Do you understand what I mean?"**

**"Surrender or capitulation is something that is not understood these days. We as women are free, liberated, but in sexual matters satisfaction comes in the ultimate sense with a man that you can trust to the extent that you relinquish all to him in that final moment. As intelligent, educated career women we view surrender in a negative way and we feel that equality means holding back. In that sense the modern woman may have deprived herself of the ultimate satisfaction in sexual matters, something the primitive woman understands better than we. Yes, orgasm is important, but there is more to sexual fulfillment than that. Capitulation follows orgasm and completes the act. You now know it and the man knows when you have given him that. If you have found that with Sherlock, you have found something very special, Joan."**

**"I did not expect it to happen, but suddenly at the . . . the peak, the climax I started to slide into it. It was like when you reach the top of a roller-coaster ride and suddenly the bottom drops put and you are gone. I was gone, completely for the first time in my life. Sherlock felt it too and we both cried."**

**Joan's eyes filled as she described what had happened to the two of them.**

**"I love everything about him . . . even the things that make me mad."**

**"Then I think that you have found something very special with Sherlock and you should follow your heart, Joan. But you must talk with Sherlock. Tell him your concerns; you need to ask him the hard questions about this matter of forgiveness."**

**As Joan left Dr. Reed, she was hopeful but also anxious about what she needed to discuss with Sherlock.**

**Sherlock found himself sitting in front of Dr. Candace Reed a couple of weeks later. He and Joan had been in an intimate relationship for two weeks. It had been the most incredible two weeks of his life, but as they lay in bed together she had asked him if he felt she was a nymphomaniac more than once. Sherlock repeatedly assured her that he did not feel that to be the case. **

**"Dr. Reed, I . . . I am here because I need to reassure Watson . . . Joan that what she gives to me is the most beautiful thing to ever happen in my life. I must speak frankly, doctor. I have been with women from everywhere in the world, but I have never experienced what I experience with Joan. But I don't know what to do to convince her that what she gives me is a beautiful gift, that she should never apologize for her sensuality."**

**"Sherlock, talk to her from your heart. Are you convinced that this is the defining relationship of your life?"**

**"Most definitely. I want no one else. I am in love with this woman."**

**"Would you think of a future that includes marriage?"**

**"I want to be with no one else. I never considered marriage before I began to love Joan, but I consider it now. I viewed monogamy as unnatural and impossible to sustain. But now I have found the one woman that I want to be with for the rest of my life. I would view it a privilege to sire a child with her. For the first time in my life, I want to be a father."**

**"These are things that you need to discuss with Watson, and soon."**

**Sherlock looked at her and nodded in agreement. He knew what he had to do.**

**Sherlock came home to the brownstone after his visit with Dr. Reed and he went to look for Joan. He had brought fresh scones from the bakery for them. Joan was lying in his bed taking a nap. They had worked most of the night on their latest**** case with Gregson and Bell and Joan was especially exhausted. Now as Sherlock saw her in his bed he only wanted to join her there. He was very tired from being up all night and the visit with Dr. Reed had only made him more tired. He stripped off his shirt and trousers and underwear and crawled naked into bed and snuggled up to Joan's warmth and wound his arms around her.**

**"Umm, Sherlock," Joan sighed and welcomed him into her arms and then quickly dropped off to sleep again.**

**"Please, Joan, I am so in need of you," Sherlock murmured as he kissed her again and again. "Darling, have mercy upon me."**

**"Oh, baby, yes. . . I 'll take care of you."**

**Joan welcomed his advances and soon they were joined in intercourse, rocking together, finding the ultimate sensual comfort in one another.**

**Sherlock was a man of seemingly inexhaustible stamina, but Joan matched him in every way, accepting him without reservation. When they came to climax together, they just floated into the afterglow still joined together till they fell asleep.**

**In the early morning they wakened with their heads on the same pillow to talk intimately as they could talk to no one else.**

**"I thank you Joan so much for giving me yourself the way that you do. I cannot describe how you make me feel when I am inside you, dearest Joan. I love you . . . love you so. I do not want this to ever end. I know that I could not go on without you. Does that make me weak, too weak for you?****"**

**"You are not weak, Sherlock. You are simply human. And I love your humanity, your passion. I will help you maintain your sobriety. I will do whatever you want to give your life meaning, to give you the peace you seek."**

**Joan kissed Sherlock gently upon his mouth and rubbed his chest all the while. Since coming together, Joan constantly felt the need to touch his body, finally coming to full acceptance of the fact Sherlock really and truly belonged to her and to her alone.**

**"I belong to you, Joan. I will never touch another woman intimately. I want you as mine alone; I want you to be my wife."**

**Joan felt her heart swell at Sherlock's declaration, hardly able to speak, but she was compelled to remind him of his own statements to the contrary.**

**"But you don't believe in marriage. Remember, I'm that female baboon with inflated genitals, that romantic terrorist?"**

**"You just had not been with the right baboon," Sherlock teased gently.****"I did not believe in love either. I thought it was of human construct, but now I know better. I have been a fool, Joan. I nearly lost you because I was blind to what was right in front of me. I want to stand up and tell everyone that I belong to you and that you belong to me. Please, Joan, share my bed for the rest of my life."**

**Sherlock kissed Joan with trembling lips and hands and they both began to weep in each other's arms in the warmth of the bed they shared.**

**"Yes, I will, Sherlock. I will. Oh, God, baby, I love you so much."**

**Sherlock groaned and his hands searched for the softness of Joan's breasts and he suckled and kissed them over and over as Joan cherished him in her bosom. Their passions rapidly escalated and they came together in intercourse, celebrating their love going all the way and over the summit together and then they wept again as Joan surrendered herself completely to her Sherlock.**

**When Sherlock and Joan wakened the next day, they looked into each other's eyes and saw the commitment they had made. Suddenly all the anxiety was gone and when Joan was wakened again later in the morning by Sherlock bringing her coffee and scones in bed, they sat against their pillows feeding each other the scones and marmalade, licking each other's fingers and sharing the same cup of coffee till they finally ended up making love even again before they could get started with the day.**


	3. Chapter 3

**Resolution and Capitulation**

**Chapter three**

**By phaedraphelan **

**Word count: 5,500**

Summary: Now that Sherlock and Joan have come to terms with their feelings for one another, how will this impact the other people around them and how will they manage to have a personal life as a couple.

Disclaimer: Elementary is the artistic property of CBS and no infringement is intended.

**Sherlock and Joan quickly found themselves helpless in the face of their need for each other. Their previous relationship had given such an intimate knowledge of each other's minds that now adding the physical aspect made them completely aware of each other on another deeper level and this made it almost impossible to resist each other. This was going to prove to be difficult for them. They came face-to-face with this reality on the afternoon when they had finally finished the working the latest handbag shop murder case and were at the brownstone discussing it. Kitty was there at first, but then remembered an errand she needed to take care of in Manhattan.**

**Sherlock sat staring at Joan as she stood at the sink getting water for making tea and he found himself overwhelmed with desire. He suddenly stood up and came behind her and put his hands upon her hips as he pressed against her, letting his hands run up and down the sides of her body.**

**"Joan, I need you in the worst way. Working with you through last night only made it worse than ever. I was distracted I fear . . . needing you so badly then . . . and now."**

**He lifted her hair from her shoulders and kissed that spot beneath her ear that he loved and then he groaned and began to push his body passionately against hers, pushing her pants and her panties down so that he could touch her soft flesh. When he sought to touch her intimately, Joan gave way to him, allowing him access to her parts, and moaned softly, as he turned her to face him.**

**"Oh, Sherlock . . . Yes . . ."**

**"Joan, luv, set me free . . . please," he begged. **

**Joan loosened his pants and it was all over. He groaned passionately as he caught her up so that she wrapped her legs around his hips as he came into her there against the kitchen counter. They quickly found their rhythm and were lost in each other standing in the brownstone's kitchen at nine in the morning, grunting and moaning as they had intercourse there.**

**"Yes, Sherlock . . . Yes!" Joan gasped and sighed over and over.**

**"I love you, Joan! I love you! Oh, God!" Sherlock cried in ecstasy as his pelvis began to jerk in powerful spasms. "Dear God! This is the only truth I know!"**

**At that moment Kitty came back to the brownstone because she had forgotten an item she needed for her errand. Sherlock and Joan were so caught up in each other that they didn't hear her come in and Kitty was momentarily stunned to walk upon them so fully involved sexually. **

**"Oh, excuse me. I-I'm sorry."**

**"Leave us, please," Sherlock implored hoarsely, shielding Joan from Kitty's view when he realized they were not alone, but Kitty had already vanished in the face of the full-blown intimacy between them.**

**Sherlock and Joan could not move for the moment, caught, as they were, in their lovers' embrace. Finally they eased their grip on one another and Joan let her legs down from his hips and breathed a sigh of relief. Sherlock smoothed her clothes awkwardly back into place as Joan tried to push him back into his trousers. **

**"We should retire to the bedroom, luv. I dare say we are not finished here yet," Sherlock murmured softly.**

**Sherlock picked Joan up in his arms and carried her to his bedroom, kicked the door closed behind them, tossed Joan on top of it, pulled the rest of her clothes off, pushed her legs wide apart and quickly mounted her on his bed. **

**"Ooh, Sherlock . . . Sherlock, baby . . . Ooh!" Joan cried out, ravished.**

**He was consumed with his passions, attacking Joan's mouth with his kisses, thrusting into her with all his power till they came to an orgasm so strong that it left them both breathless.**

**"Oh, dear God, please forgive me! I can't help myself with you, Joan. I love you so much! Forgive my roughness, Joan! Please! I was so aroused by you!"**

**Sherlock saw Kitty later the next day and dealt with the matter forthrightly.**

**"Kitty, unfortunately you caught Joan and myself unawares at an inopportune moment. I sincerely regret this and we will endeavor to be more discreet in the future." **

**Sherlock flushed in spite of himself, rolling his eyes in his characteristic manner and Kitty simply kept her head down, unable to look him In the eye.**

**"It was beautiful . . . what I saw between you, not like anything I have ever seen between a man and a woman . . . the words, the way she was saying 'yes' to you and the way you were callin' her name. You really do love each other. It's not just screwin' with you two, is it?"**

**Sherlock took a deep breath before answering her.**

**"No, Kitty, it is not just coitus," Sherlock sighed, stating it as a fact.**

**Kitty nodded and left the room.**

**Later Joan and Kitty spoke on the same matter after they had been at the rape crisis group meeting.**

**"You and Sherlock have a real case of it, eh?"**

**Joan hesitated before replying to Kitty, trying to come up with a plausible response and finally simply spoke the truth.**

**"Yes, Kitty, we do. I am truly sorry you caught us unawares yesterday.**

**"It hurt me when that pervert forced himself on me, Watson. Every single time he did it he hurt me. But it was different with you and Sherlock, wasn't it? It was good, what he was doing to you, wasn't it?"**

**"Yes, Kitty, it was . . . wonderful . . . because I know that he loves me and the way he was with me let me know that he loved me and cared for me as a woman, as a person. I wanted him that same way. When you love a man, Kitty, you both want to be as close as is humanly possible. But unless the love is there, it is not a beautiful thing."**

**"He loves you. I could tell by the way he called your name. He was calling to God when he came. I never heard Sherlock call on God, but I heard him calling out before I came into the room. I did not know what was happening till I saw your legs wrapped around him and his pants coming off his hairy bum. I'm sorry to have barged in like that. You were both completely gone, Watson."**

**"Yes, we were, Kitty." Joan flushed in embarrassment as she remembered the state Kitty had found her in with Sherlock.**

**"You know, you two need to move back in together. Nowadays you are both always lookin' like you want to jump on each other. And you keep messin' with him and you're gonna get pregnant. I hope you are taking the pill," Kitty said with the sageness of a woman twice her age. **

**"You are right and I am," Joan answered simply. It was true.**

**Joan flushed, remembering the moment that Kitty described, recalling her very passionate Sherlock that morning as they stood joined in coitus in front of the kitchen sink. She had been unable to collect herself at that moment and when she knew anything, she was hearing Sherlock's voice begging Kitty to leave them be.**

**When she later recounted the conversation to Sherlock, she found it difficult to discuss the matters involving Sherlock and herself without it affecting her. **

**"She thinks she needs to find her own place because we need . . . privacy," Joan said blushing slightly in that way that Sherlock found adorable.**

**Sherlock found himself unable to speak about their newfound relationship without his own heart starting to throb in his chest.**

**"She's right, luv. I will not impede her from doing that if that is what she wishes. Don't you believe that you and I need to live together again, I mean live together as man and woman, Joan?"**

**"Yes, I guess that I do."**

**"I can't bear to be away from you . . . at night . . . or in the morning . . or anytime for that matter, Joan. I need to know at the end of every day that I will be in bed with you."**

**"She told me that I should be careful, as she put it, 'messing' with you because I will get pregnant if I'm not careful. Imagine, she acted like she was my mother!"**

**"Do you fear that I'm going to impregnate you, Joan?" Sherlock stared at Joan in that way of his that made her warm all over as he drew her into his arms.**

**"I am taking the pill. Sometimes when we are together I wish that I weren't."**

**"Hum, that was one of the recurring dreams I had when we were apart."**

**"What, Sherlock? What did you dream?"**

**"I dreamed that I had made you pregnant, that you were carrying our wee one. You were beautiful, full here in your belly." He rubbed Joan's flat belly gently and her eyes filled with tears. "I must ask you something that I never thought I would ask. If I asked you, would you marry me and carry our wee one in your belly?"**

**"Yes, I would. I have had that same dream."**

**At that moment Joan, seeing the emotion in Sherlock's eyes, reached for his hand, taking it, kissing the roughness of the palm of his hand, inhaling the scent of him, of rosin and beeswax mingled with sandalwood, as if her life depended upon it. He was wearing his shirt sleeves rolled up to his elbows and Joan rubbed her cheek against his forearm, against the abundant silky hair that adorned him there, inhaling the scent of him."**

**"Good Lord, woman!"**

**"What is to become of us, Sherlock? I'm finding it so difficult to keep my hands off you."**

**Sherlock caught her up onto his lap and suddenly they were kissing passionately. Sherlock rubbed her hip and flank desperately and he was soon feverishly pushing his hand under her sweater searching for her warm soft breasts with his slender fingers as his mouth hungrily claimed hers again and again.**

**"In my dream your breasts were full, swollen and heavy, ready to give suck. Oh, my Joan . . ." Sherlock groaned passionately.**

**"Sherlock, we need to go into your bedroom. We can't afford that Kitty find us undone again."**

**He picked Joan up and carried her to his bed and they lay down together. They stared at each other for a long moment before they kissed tenderly and then passionately in the deep kiss that would completely unhinge them.**

**"Oh, Joan . . . Joan, I see you or touch you and I'm lost, swimming in a sea of beautiful emotions, my heart sending me spiraling in an unbelievable passion. The heat I feel for you is impossible to describe. I constantly have this need to be with you, luv. Will you please hold me the way you do?"**

**"Yes, Sherlock . . . yes," Joan moaned as they moved closer and closer together, breathing each other in.**

**"Dear Joan, Joan!" Sherlock groaned as he lay near her. "I missed you so when I was in London. All those months I dreamed about you whenever I slept. I so often tried not to sleep because I couldn't keep those dreams of you away. Oh, luv, luv, luv!"**

**"I was so glad you came back to me, Sherlock. Ooh, yes!"**

**"Oh, God! God! I love you so! I feared so that I had lost you."**

**"Sherlock, baby, it's all right. I'm here for you."**

**"Please don't ever leave me, Joanie. I could not bear this life without you, my lovely honeybee. It was so hard being away from you all those months. I had no one to love me till you came into my life, my lovely Joan."**

**"I missed you so, Sherlock. I dreamed of being with you, and loving you . . . having you, but thinking that it was impossible."**

**"I never stopped loving you, Joan, not for one moment. That is why it hurt so much when you went with Mycroft. I needed you, luv. I had never experienced these kinds of emotions in my life. I didn't believe it was possible, that it was a reality. But I didn't care what you did or whom you had been with. I couldn't stop the feelings for you that were lodged in my heart. Do you understand, my darling Joan? And now . . . I can't hold back from sobbing when I feel this reality. I never cried when making love with a woman till you."**

**Sherlock's silent tears spilled over as he lay in Joan's arms and Joan kissed them away and the happiness and peace they felt in those moments was impossible to describe as they lay together, making love, drifting and dozing that afternoon.**

**That very day Joan began to seriously contemplate moving back into the brownstone with Sherlock. She decided to spend a weekend there. ****It was as if she had never moved when she came back those few days. That first evening Kitty announced that she was going to be out of the house for the weekend with her Zachary and his friends to give Sherlock and Joan some totally private time. Being around them during down time had become increasingly uncomfortable for her because even though they consciously restrained themselves, it was obvious that they were profoundly stimulated by each other.**

**Sherlock made a fire in the fireplace and Joan made tea and brought it to Sherlock where he sat, kneeling before him in the traditional Chinese manner and handing him his cup with her two hands. Sherlock took the cup, sipped from it and set it on the side table and drew her up onto his lap.**

**"You are the only one to serve me tea in this manner. You did it the first time after the Moriarty affair. That is when you told me the meaning of this."**

**"It means that I adore and respect you in the ultimate sense. The only men I have served tea in this manner are my father and grandfather."**

**"I cannot believe that we are as we are now, luv. I do adore you so."**

**Sherlock and Joan kissed as he held her on his lap on the sofa. And the kiss that began as a tender exploration of each other's mouths rapidly became wildly passionate as they pulled each other's clothes out of the way so they could touch each other, moaning softly.**

**"Oh, God, Joan," Sherlock groaned, "I am so thankful that you came home to me. For the rest of my life I promise to love you with all that I am or ever will be. Dearest Joan . . . my woman, my lover, my only one. I will try with all that I am to be a worthy consort."**

**"Yes, Sherlock, I am yours and I will be yours. Take care of me, baby, and I will always take care of you."**

**Joan reached for Sherlock's cup of tea, sipped from it and handed it to Sherlock to drink again. Sherlock took a long draught of the Earl Grey and set the cup aside again for a moment. He searched for Joan's mouth and kissed her again, his mouth plumbing the depths of hers, tasting her, tasting the Earl Grey on her tongue as his slender fingers hands searched her hips and her flanks caressing, squeezing her and then finding their way to where his imagination already taken him. **

**"Sherlock . . . Sherlock . . . Ooh, Sherlock. . . I can't resist you. I'm afraid of what I feel when you touch me there like that. I become this sex-crazed woman . . . Sherlock."**

**"Your sexual drive and your sexual response is a marvelous gift . . . the most beautiful thing I could imagine receiving from a woman. I respect you . . . the way you held back from coming after me. You knew that I wanted you from that first day you walked into this brownstone but you held back. You have suffered so many nights. I have heard you moaning in your sleep those nights when I sat in your room watching you sleep, and I wanted to give you what you needed, but I held back. I am just an addict, hardly deserving to have the treasure of your passionate nature, but now I know that I can take care of your passions. When I saw you let go and enjoy yourself, I knew that I had found the most beautiful thing in life with you."**

**Joan put her hand on his hairy chest inside his open shirt and she scratched him there and then let her tiny fingers pinch and massage his chest, causing him to gasp passionately.**

**"Joanie . . . lovely honeybee . . . I dreamed of your hands on me like this so many lonely nights. Thank you so much for touching me and, and letting me . . . letting me touch you and love you. Oh, Joan!"**

**Sherlock's flesh was making its presence known in no uncertain terms, his excitement so evident that Joan moaned helplessly, beginning to tremble and quiver on his lap as she felt the excitement in his flesh.**

**"Ooh, Sherlock . . . Sherlock, help me . . . you. . . you are the only one who knows how to help me when I am like this. Please, baby! No other man knows what to do for me. You make me want you inside me in the worst way. I am so hot for you. I'm ready all the time, baby." **

**She gripped his hand and put it where she wanted it, as they kissed with abandon. **

**"Oh my God, Joan! This is what I love about you. You face the reality of our sexual need for each other. You are all that I need."**

**"Oh, Sherlock . . . Sherlock," Joan moaned, opening her thighs wide for him to have his way completely with her.**

**"Darling Joan . . . Darling Joan . . ." Sherlock murmured as he pulled Joan down on top of him on the sofa.**

**"Umm, Sherlock . . . I love you . . . so . . . so."**

**"Let's go to my bed, luv. You're at home now."**

**Sherlock helped Joan up, picked her up in his arms, led her into his bedroom and closed the door behind them.**

**It was the next morning when Sherlock wakened with Joan wrapped around him in their bed. He carefully extricated himself and kissed Joan ever so softly before getting out of bed. He stopped for a long moment staring at Joan in his bed, remembering the passion of the night before. He reached and lifted a long lock of her silky black hair, kissed it, and let it slip through his fingers before easing from bed.**

**Joan turned, realizing that he was going to leave her alone in bed and sighed, reaching for him with her hand. Sherlock caught it in his and bent and kissed it.**

**"I'm going to make coffee, luv. I expect we will be hearing from Gregson on the case. Do you want to beg off today? We can make breakfast, lie about for a while."**

**Joan stretched and the covers slipped slightly and she reached to cover herself again.**

**"Please don't cover up. Indulge me, luv."**

**Joan threw the covers back and Sherlock stared, mesmerized at the sight of her, his nostrils flaring in arousal, his pupils fully dilated, catching his lower lip in his teeth in that way that Joan found irresistible.**

**"You're going to have to come back here and finish what you started with that look, Sherlock. I'm not nearly done with you."**

**And that is what he did.**

**Joan and Sherlock decided to take the next couple days to adjust to how it would be to live together in this new relationship. Kitty was away and this gave the lovers time and privacy to explore none stop all that they were feeling. They had no desire to leave the brownstone for any reason and so Sherlock made scrambled eggs and toast when they were finally able to get out of bed. Joan watched him puttering about in the kitchen and could not resist coming behind him to hug him.**

**"I promised you this hug several weeks or so ago, didn't I?"**

**"And I warned you at that time that dangerous consequences would present themselves in that event, didn't I?"**

**Sherlock smiled to himself as he enjoyed Joan's playful attention. He was wearing a dark blue tee shirt and sweatpants and Joan found him quite tantalizing, so much so that she playfully pulled them off his muscular hips so that she could squeeze and explore him there as she hugged him.**

**"And what would you have done, if I had hugged you then?" Joan teased.**

**"Darling, I had not been with a woman since a couple months before I left London. And that had been from sheer necessity and quite unfulfilling to boot. I had been in such persistent need that if you had touched me, I would have lost it completely. You would have to have told me 'no'."**

**"You needed a woman," Joan said softly against his back. "You came back to New York needing a woman and you needed a woman to take care of you that day. I know all your tells, Sherlock. I wanted to hug you in the worst way, but I was afraid of what I was feeling for you. It was all I could do to keep my hands off you."**

**"I didn't just need any woman. I needed you, Joan. And seeing you again only made me all the more keen for you. My feelings for you never left me the whole time we were apart. And then when I saw you again, it all came barreling back on me. That is why I went to see Dr. Reed. It all was driving me quite mad, Joan. If you had not permitted me to work with you again, I don't know what I would have done. But you . . ."**

**Sherlock turned to face Joan and they both gasped as they realized how their close proximity had aroused them both. Sherlock bent to kiss Joan's cheeks and their hug tightened as they kissed passionately, their bodies pressed as closely together as humanly possible.**

**"I couldn't say 'no' to you because I loved you too much to refuse you. But I was so scared that we would hurt each other again. I was scared to be close to you if I couldn't touch you, Sherlock."**

**"Luv, if we want to eat now, I dare say we should take a break from this activity or I will not be responsible for what happens. You have me very much in gear right at this moment. I only want one thing now."**

**Sherlock and Joan kissed passionately holding on to each other for dear life as Sherlock backed Joan in the direction of one of the kitchen chairs where they sat down, all the while pulling down each other's pants, so that he could draw Joan down to straddle his ready flesh and they both cried out at the intense pleasure that coursed through them in that moment when they came together. **

**"Joan . . . Joan! Oh, Jesus!"**

**They were rocking together, causing the old chair to creak rhythmically as they moved in sync.**

**"So sorry, luv. Planning to eat . . . lost it when you touched me the way you did."**

**"I couldn't resist you, Sherlock. I couldn't resist you."**

**They rapidly found that moment of supreme pleasure together, laughing and kissing and nipping each other as it rolled over them, finally leaving Joan with her face buried in Sherlock's chest.**

**"Joan . . . luv . . . luv, I am lost in my passion for you. At this moment I don't care if I never eat again."**

**Joan smiled and lifted her head so that she could look into Sherlock's eyes. His blue-green irises nearly vanished surrounding his dilated pupils in thin circles of brilliant color and his nostrils flared as he kissed Joan all over her face.**

**"Sherlock, I'm sorry I couldn't help touching you and wanting you."**

**"And you are utterly irresistible, darling."**

**"Sherlock, you have me so woozy. I'm needing a nap now."**

**Sherlock lifted Joan up in his arms and stood up and then carried her and sat her over on the sofa.**

**"Now, lover, I beg you to sit right here till I redo those eggs and toast, because if I don't get some protein into me, I will be unable to rise to our next occasion."**

**Sherlock kissed Joan soundly and then had to shake his head at his predicament as he tried to push himself back into his sweat pants so that he could finish preparing their breakfast. A bemused and very mellow Sherlock smiled continuously to himself till he finished their late breakfast of bacon and eggs scrambled with cheese, toast and coffee and brought it on a tray to the sofa where Joan had dropped off for a short post-coital nap. He was struck by her beauty as she lay sleeping, her clothing still in complete disarray, her hair tousled, her face flushed as she snored softly.**

_**My woman doesn't know how lovely she is after we have been together. She is so passionate. She wants it as much as I do. Her body is so ready for me all the time. ****I can't imagine how she managed all those months of being without. Her breasts are so lovely nestled together like that. Just that glimpse of her soft belly and hips naked like that. I can hardly keep my mind on what I'm doing here.**_

**As Sherlock put their breakfast on the coffee table, he leaned down to wake Joan with another kiss, gently pulling down her shirt to cover her breasts and covering her naked lower body with the afghan there so that he could focus on the matters at hand.**

**"You are amazing, Sherlock, truly amazing," Joan murmured as she wakened and realized that she was practically naked under the afghan.**

**"You are quite certain of this, my dear Watson? That is a most generous assessment, one that I am not worthy of."**

**"I am positive. You make me crazy when I'm with you now. Look at me!"**

**"Yes, I enjoyed seeing my sex kitten so beautifully carried away. Please don't put your clothes back on right now, luv."**

**Sherlock and Joan ate finally, their bodies needing the nourishment provided. Then they sat back and enjoyed coffee together on the sofa, their flesh touching from shoulders to calves as they reflected on the change in their relationship.**

**Ever so often they turned to each other and kissed tenderly and whispered a very personal endearment. Joan smiled and then giggled as Sherlock referred to her intimate parts in a most specific and complimentary manner. **

**"I will never tire of hearing you say that word to me in my ear, Sherlock."**

**"Do you know the word I mean?"**

**"You mean that word you only whisper in my ear when you are in the throes of ecstasy?"**

**Sherlock whispered the word again, modified with the adjective "beautiful" and patted her at the place he had referred to so graphically and Joan put her hand on the source of his arousal and he just groaned her name, writhing under her touch.**

**"It's true. It's all very true, Joan. You amaze me every time this happens. I don't know how we stayed apart for those two years that we lived together in the same house. You were constantly on my mind, but I did not dare encroach upon you that way."**

**"I cannot help myself now, Sherlock, when you touch me and talk to me the way that you do." **

**"May I suggest that we just attend to ourselves today, my dearest Watson?"**

**Joan quivered helplessly and reached over to run her hand up and down his muscled thigh which evoked the same response in Sherlock as frissons of pleasure surged through him.**

**Finally Sherlock drew the soft afghan across them to cover them, but that did not stop the sensual touching between them as they snuggled together. Joan moaned softly as they became entwined, their hands exploring each other till they fell asleep under the afghan.**

**In the afternoon they pulled themselves together and got dressed in spite of their distraction with each other and went out to eat. In the frigid air they enjoyed being close together walking hand in hand. **

**"Joan," Sherlock said. "We need to have something special to eat. What do you crave, luv?"**

**"I want Italian. Can we go to that northern Italian restaurant off Canal Street that we went to last year. Their escargots were so good."**

**"Italian it is. I feel the same."**

**They made their way to Forlini's, a family restaurant south of Canal Street and were ushered into a booth that was somewhat secluded.**

**Their waitress, Anita, was a vivacious red headed member of the Forlini family who loved to take a personal interest in her clientele. She immediately picked up on the passionate undercurrent between Sherlock and Joan.**

**"Hi, I'm Anita. My, you two look like you are really enjoying being together."**

**"Matter of fact, we are, Anita. It is a great time for us. I find myself completely in love with this woman here."**

**Joan flushed in the face of Sherlock's comments and they settled in to enjoy a delicious meal of escargots sautéed in butter and flavored with fresh garlic and then linguini with chunks of lobster in a creamy sauce, all of it topped off with an excellent tiramisu that they shared, feeding it to each other as they drank cups of expresso coffee with it. **

**As they finished the meal, they were replete, overstimulated by the sumptuous fare.**

**Sherlock stared at Joan, his mind now taking him in another direction, profoundly aware of Joan's sexual allure as he imagined the sensation of touching her breasts and of the taste of her mouth.**

**"Sherlock, you make me so warm when you look at me like that."**

**"I am lusting so for you. I want to take you home now. Do you mind?"**

**Sherlock hailed a taxi and they headed for Brooklyn. Sherlock fell silent and Joan reached for his hand and held it.**

**"You are quiet."**

**"I can think only of my sole remaining need. I love you so much."**

**Sherlock drew Joan onto his lap in the cab, letting his hand slip up her skirt to find its place between her thighs, as he kissed her hard on her mouth. She tasted of tiramisu and coffee.**

**When they got into the brownstone, Sherlock took Joan's coat, hung it up, and immediately caught her up in his arms and began to kiss her. Sherlock's passions surged as she clung to him and he moaned softly as she helped him pull his jacket off and then unbuttoned his shirt so that she could touch his chest.**

**"Oh, Sherlock, Sherlock," she murmured as he picked her up and carried her to their bedroom.**

**"Joanie, I love you and need you desperately. But I want to talk with you about my feelings. I need to tell you why I love being with you. But I must mention Irene. When I was with her, I wasn't really with her. She carefully rationed her time with me, and she never really gave me enough . . . of herself. In fact she took pride in the fact that I was always left wanting. And then there would be weeks sometimes that would pass between my seeing her. Do you understand me? You are so generous to me, Joan, matching my own need and your own sensual appetites in every way. I . . . I feel so honored that you give me yourself so graciously. Being one in intercourse with you is the most amazing sexual experience of my life and a gift beyond description. That is what brings me to tears sometimes when we are together."**

**Joan caressed Sherlock's stubbled cheek and kissed his lips tenderly. She was tearing up as well and her tears spilled over.**

**"Luv, you are crying too." Sherlock tasted her tears as he returned each kiss, his hand caressing her cheek.**

**"I can't help it. But I just didn't want you to think I'm some kind of crazed nymphomaniac."**

**" I have told you why I would not think that, Joan?"**

**"I want you all the time, and I can't hold myself in check when I'm around you, Sherlock. I see you and I just want to crawl all over you and give myself to you. I can't hold anything back. Please don't devalue me because I need you so. You truly are the only man who knows what to do for me. You do know every single one of my needs as a woman and you take care of me, Sherlock. . . completely."**

**"You are the jewel of my life, Joan. I love your passion, your abandon. I am honored that you want me, that my body can bring you pleasure. When you need to be loved, I want you to let me know. When I hear you call my name in that moment, my heart feels as if it will burst. And when I feel you melt the way you do in your moment of capitulation, I want to sob for joy. That is how I feel about you. I have never been a religious man, but when you give yourself to me the way that you do, I feel as if I am receiving something sacred from you. For the first time in my life I understand why the relationship between a man and a woman can be characterized as 'holy.' That is why I asked you to marry me that afternoon at The Chatwal, Joan. For the first time in my life I want all that marriage entails. I want the misery and I want the joy. And if it is possible, I want to fill your belly with life while there is still time. I want to be the one you fight with, the one you make up with, the one to protect you, the one you sleep with every night of your life."**

**"Oh, Sherlock . . . Sherlock!"**

**Sherlock bent his head and kissed her neck, her cheeks, and drew her blouse open so that he could kiss her breasts over and over. Joan held him close, running her fingers through his hair, then pushed his shirt out of the way and off so that she could caress his shoulders and back, finding pleasure in revisiting every inch of his body. She kissed his left shoulder with its intricate weblike network of tattoos, licking and sucking and learning the taste of each part of him that went along with the scent she already knew so well, listening to Sherlock sigh and gasp raggedly as he reacted to each touch, each caress, his whole body beginning to vibrate in anticipation of becoming one with her again.**

**"Dear Lord, Joan!" Sherlock growled as he kissed Joan again. **

**He was rapidly becoming lost in her, as she surrendered to kiss after ardent kiss. He knew that he was about to be a goner as he buried his face in her breasts and then her soft belly, moaning softly as he kissed her all over her body, exploring her as only he could do, revisiting all the places he found such pleasure in.**

**"Sherlock . . . yes," she sighed as Sherlock took her and claimed her for himself once again.. **

**"I'm gone, Joan, completely gone."**

**Joan wailed his name helplessly as the rhythm of coitus seized them and took them and held them captive in its own peculiar cadence.**

**Joan saw stars as the climax swept her forward to the summit and then she felt herself sliding down from that precipice to that place where Sherlock's arms would catch her and suspend her in a state of complete surrender in his arms.**

**"Sherlock . . . Sherlock, yes!"**

**"Oh, Joan! Darling . . . I love you . . . love you so," Sherlock cried out and his whole body went rigid at that moment. "Oh, God! Help us!"**

**Sherlock's whole body was trembling and jerking as spasms seized him and his brain exploded in blue and white lights and he lost vision as it rolled over them and left them clinging to one another, entwined, exchanging tender words and soft gentle kisses as the afterglow settled upon them.**

**"Dear, dear Joan, my Joan, my lovely Joan."**

**"Sherlock . . . Sher . . . lock . . . ummm"**

**Joan cherished Sherlock's head against her breasts and ran her fingers through his hair murmuring his name over and over as Sherlock drew their blankets up over their sated bodies as they drifted in and out of sleep, luxuriating in the closeness of each other's flesh as they lay in bed wrapped around each othe****r.**


End file.
